Last week, my favorite cousin Greg called me. I was happy to hear from him and happy to hear he had some "big news": he's engaged. I wasn't surprised. I saw it coming. Greg is a token good guy - the rare monogamous type who always has a serious girlfriend. He's completely avoided the phase that most men enter in their mid-20s called "being a man whore." So it makes perfect sense that he's marrying his girlfriend of 3 years. And I couldn't be happier for him! Who doesn't love a wedding with all the vows and dancing and relatives who drink too much? But in my family, there's a chronological marriage line. Now that my slighter older cousin is getting married – I'm the next one in line. Already, the inquiring phone calls from my family have begun. How's your love life? Any new "friends?" Seriously – is there something clinically wrong with you that you're not married, engaged, and/or knocked up? After drowning my sorrows in martinis and making out with boys I don't know – I contemplated it. Here's The Top Five Reasons Why You're Single.

1) Are you a social recluse?

One thing about nyc living: no one wants to stay in their 9 x 9 ft shoebox apartments. But if you spend night after night at home with a bedside stack of NY Post sodukus and a pint of B&J … you may be suffering from acute anti-socialism disorder. (Note: not a real disorder – I made it up.) Okay, so maybe you're a little shy. No worries - this city is known for its aloof inhabitants who ignore each other on a daily basis. You can go all day without speaking to anyone!

Solution: Try going to the MoMa or the Strand where you can bask in comforting solitude. Plus – you may meet someone who is equally shy / socially challenged and indulge in a little eye flirting.

2) Could it be the Ex factor?

Everyone has the one *sigh* that got away. That one unrequited love whose number you can't forget and you always drunk-dial on New Year's. Some hopeless romantics waste years pining over "the one" in the hopes that they'll return. Stop it. Stop it right now. This is real life, not a Nicholas Sparks movie adaptation of a sappy melodramatic novel. There's thousands of other fish in the sea and you happen to be swimming in one overcrowded (and probably dirty) fishbowl.

Solution: Head to a two-for-one night at a pub during a big game – you can let out your bitterness by yelling profanities without judgment. And with a great cheap beer buzz – you may meet a quick rebound while you get over your Ex (whatever their name was).

3) Do you work too much / drink too much / insert bad habit too much?

Face it. You're a workaholic, alcoholic, or addicted to some other weird fetish that I thought best not to describe here. Consider the mathematical breakdown - if 22 hours of your day are spent doing one thing only – there's no time for romance. What's the point of making all that money if you're alone? And what's the fun in drinking alone? (Fact: that was probably the red flag that sent you to AA to begin with.)

Solution: Try pursuing a healthy hobby. Preferably one in the social arena to help you develop friendships with real people rather than your "Crackberry" and a bottle of Jack.

4) How's your confidence?

Feeling bad because you're too short, small, fat, or tall? Or do you just smell? It may be your silly insecurities that are holding you back. Both men and women consider confidence to be the sexiest trait in a partner. And, people can tell if you're faking it (they can tell you're faking other things but that's another column.) Looking good comes from feeling good so smile and make eye contact instead of obsessing over imagined flaws.

Solution: Hit the gym. Throw on some heels. Oh, and take a shower.

5) Do you just like being single?

Single-hood got a boost after that whole SATC thing - it was all about cosmos and ridiculously large flower pins. But what it comes down is just being happy with your life. Being single means more than not wearing a ring. It means: no strings, no pressure, no fights, no breakups, no breakdowns, no worries about what your significant other will do if they found out you drank too much, spent a month's paycheck, rode a mechanic bull, lost your shirt, and broke your toe all in one night. I'm not talking from personal experience. Absolutely not.

Solution: None - you're single. Enjoy it.

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